f9yx0du 发表于 2024-10-9 22:09:43

满分作文《论生逢其时》,满满的时代感,格局一下子就打开了


    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;">议论文是高中生常写的文体,写得多了,自然会有<span style="color: black;">非常多</span>经验,<span style="color: black;">不外</span><span style="color: black;">这般</span>的写作经验<span style="color: black;">针对</span><span style="color: black;">朋友</span>们未必是好事,有的<span style="color: black;">朋友</span>的议论文就会<span style="color: black;">显现</span>很深的模式化痕迹,在考场之中虽然不至于会得低分,得零分,<span style="color: black;">不外</span>很难得到高分。<span style="color: black;">亦</span>是要加以<span style="color: black;">注重</span>的,大<span style="color: black;">都数</span><span style="color: black;">朋友</span>的语文考试分数都相差不大,<span style="color: black;">不外</span>作文得高分的<span style="color: black;">朋友</span>,<span style="color: black;">常常</span>成绩是名列前茅的。<span style="color: black;">因此呢</span>,还是要<span style="color: black;">加强</span>自己写议论文的水平。</p>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;">今天欣赏的这篇作文是来自去年高考北京卷的作文,先来<span style="color: black;">瞧瞧</span>作文原题。</p>
    <div style="color: black; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 10px;"><img src="https://p3-sign.toutiaoimg.com/tos-cn-i-qvj2lq49k0/a9fe1d124cf64612bc93fac2cb35a75b~noop.image?_iz=58558&amp;from=article.pc_detail&amp;lk3s=953192f4&amp;x-expires=1728696378&amp;x-signature=A1iAvRchUK0h%2Fd2pEr5r0nHWbuk%3D" style="width: 50%; margin-bottom: 20px;"></div>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;">这是一篇命题作文,题目<span style="color: black;">已然</span>给出来的,只是这个原题中有两段材料,<span style="color: black;">第1</span>段的材料给出的作文题目是《论生逢其时》,从这个“论”能够看出,<span style="color: black;">这儿</span>写议论文是比较合适的。这段材料看上去是<span style="color: black;">无</span>难度的,能够看出材料的中心思想是“人生”和“时代”,<span style="color: black;">便是</span>要<span style="color: black;">朋友</span>们思考人生和时代的关系,“生逢其时”其实<span style="color: black;">更加多</span>的偏向与社会给个人带来的“给予”,与唯物史观相联系,<span style="color: black;">便是</span>“时势造英雄”。<span style="color: black;">倘若</span>从对立的<span style="color: black;">方向</span>举反例来论证<span style="color: black;">亦</span>是<span style="color: black;">能够</span>的。</p>
    <div style="color: black; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 10px;"><img src="https://p3-sign.toutiaoimg.com/tos-cn-i-qvj2lq49k0/3b655c1c52be421889acc34cb9d82044~noop.image?_iz=58558&amp;from=article.pc_detail&amp;lk3s=953192f4&amp;x-expires=1728696378&amp;x-signature=qgtaQtFmLWkjNqMeo%2BAiUjo4XzA%3D" style="width: 50%; margin-bottom: 20px;"></div>
    <div style="color: black; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 10px;"><img src="https://p3-sign.toutiaoimg.com/tos-cn-i-qvj2lq49k0/64edab749ab343299eb4040b809c469a~noop.image?_iz=58558&amp;from=article.pc_detail&amp;lk3s=953192f4&amp;x-expires=1728696378&amp;x-signature=u0M1YpY5S1qHAHDYamc33A0G9S0%3D" style="width: 50%; margin-bottom: 20px;"></div>
    <div style="color: black; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 10px;"><img src="https://p3-sign.toutiaoimg.com/tos-cn-i-qvj2lq49k0/0af03d0b7b184af8b6f8e2e835c34673~noop.image?_iz=58558&amp;from=article.pc_detail&amp;lk3s=953192f4&amp;x-expires=1728696378&amp;x-signature=V6cGuRr5cYife0hs2Sef2Derq%2FE%3D" style="width: 50%; margin-bottom: 20px;"></div>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;">这篇作文是当时的满分作文之一,这是一篇比较接“地气”的<span style="color: black;">文案</span>,在<span style="color: black;">文案</span>中运用了<span style="color: black;">非常多</span>近现代的事例,<span style="color: black;">例如</span>国家<span style="color: black;">针对</span>青少年的四大谆谆教诲:“立大志,明大德,成大才,担大任”;“三牛”精神,既“孺子牛”焦裕禄,“拓荒牛”华为,“老黄牛”扶贫工作者;鲁迅现身过的作品等等。</p>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;">这些近现代的例子其实很不错,<span style="color: black;">不外</span>有的<span style="color: black;">朋友</span>总觉得<span style="color: black;">这般</span>的例子太老套,像是在歌功颂德,心里感到别扭,<span style="color: black;">因此</span>宁可去找<span style="color: black;">有些</span>孤陋寡闻的例子,<span style="color: black;">亦</span>不愿意用这些事例。<span style="color: black;">这般</span>的想法西药改变,耳熟能详的例子能够灵活应用,用到合适的<span style="color: black;">地区</span>,加上自己独特的见解,<span style="color: black;">亦</span>不失为一种新颖的思路。</p>
    <div style="color: black; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 10px;"><img src="https://p3-sign.toutiaoimg.com/tos-cn-i-qvj2lq49k0/7aeb616c23774da2a334b4ffcc0f881f~noop.image?_iz=58558&amp;from=article.pc_detail&amp;lk3s=953192f4&amp;x-expires=1728696378&amp;x-signature=38HMCnvB2vpswByfrOEd%2BqjV%2FIo%3D" style="width: 50%; margin-bottom: 20px;"></div>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;"><span style="color: black;">况且</span>,<span style="color: black;">这般</span>主旋律的事例用在作文中是恰到好处的,能够<span style="color: black;">表现</span><span style="color: black;">朋友</span>们<span style="color: black;">针对</span>时事的关心程度。<span style="color: black;">有些</span>有利于人民,有利于社会,有利于国家的事例就需要去歌颂,去宣传,这是一种社会责任,无需担心歌功颂德而心理别扭。</p>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;"><span style="color: black;">做为</span>一篇议论文,其优点<span style="color: black;">亦</span>是很<span style="color: black;">明显</span>的。聚焦了当下的<span style="color: black;">有些</span>热点时间,紧扣题目“生逢其时”,<span style="color: black;">朋友</span>们就生活在当下的这个社会,生活在当下,就会有<span style="color: black;">有些</span>感触。在<span style="color: black;">文案</span>的开头,<span style="color: black;">亦</span>引用了李白的例子,引出了肯定“生逢其时”的观点,<span style="color: black;">而后</span>围绕着当代<span style="color: black;">青年</span>人<span style="color: black;">怎样</span>实现人生价值来展开论述。</p>
    <div style="color: black; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 10px;"><img src="https://p3-sign.toutiaoimg.com/tos-cn-i-qvj2lq49k0/cdfb341de1d5482fa2b29d7f72e65b6a~noop.image?_iz=58558&amp;from=article.pc_detail&amp;lk3s=953192f4&amp;x-expires=1728696378&amp;x-signature=%2FRJ3%2BPmDauekgWDRWE27S1sc1tA%3D" style="width: 50%; margin-bottom: 20px;"></div>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;"><span style="color: black;">文案</span>的结构很<span style="color: black;">显著</span>,是基本的总分总结构,开头<span style="color: black;">便是</span>一段总数,结尾则是升华主题,加深了感情。中间论述的这一大部分比较多,既是在论述<span style="color: black;">亦</span>是在分解和细化论证。</p>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;"><span style="color: black;">文案</span>的语言很朴实,有感情,运用了<span style="color: black;">海量</span>的对偶句,对比句,使得<span style="color: black;">文案</span>的语言充满了韵律美,读起来朗朗上口,语言简练而<span style="color: black;">寓意</span>隽永。</p>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;">这是一篇比较容易学习和模仿的议论文,<span style="color: black;">朋友</span>们都能够看得明白这篇作文,不管是结构还是思路都很清晰。之所以能够得到满分,可能是这篇<span style="color: black;">文案</span>紧密的结合当下的时政,歌颂了当今的时代精神,着眼于眼前,<span style="color: black;">才可</span>更好的展望<span style="color: black;">将来</span>,<span style="color: black;">这般</span>的想法比较符合阅卷老师的胃口吧。</p>
    <div style="color: black; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 10px;"><img src="https://p3-sign.toutiaoimg.com/tos-cn-i-qvj2lq49k0/a549bd31ea60423caa5c3c48c3bc8967~noop.image?_iz=58558&amp;from=article.pc_detail&amp;lk3s=953192f4&amp;x-expires=1728696378&amp;x-signature=Ea%2BKciCLLlBBju2vyUNtAzb6RbI%3D" style="width: 50%; margin-bottom: 20px;"></div>
    <p style="font-size: 16px; color: black; line-height: 40px; text-align: left; margin-bottom: 15px;">当<span style="color: black;">朋友</span>们写议论文的时候,要吸取这篇<span style="color: black;">文案</span>的优点,结合当下的时事,热点,要让文字富有时代感,有活力。提出论据要符合论点,再加入适当的抒情,让<span style="color: black;">文案</span>更加饱满,有深意,有思考深度。</p>




b1gc8v 发表于 3 天前

你的话语如春风拂面,温暖了我的心房,真的很感谢。
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